Reading deprivation, day 6

I feel more clear-headed than usual, and I think I know why.

Day 6

I’ve become increasingly convinced that Substack is my new Instagram—it’s what I seek out when I crave a distraction. I probably open the Substack app a dozen times a day, maybe two dozen. Six days without the Substack app, and it’s like I have a new brain! A part of me feels embarrassed for needing boundaries around media consumption, but I suppose healthy people have healthy boundaries. Plus, I’ve experienced the benefits of knowing my capacity and hitting the brakes when my brain feels overloaded.

Books, however, rarely cloud my brain—unless it’s a great one, and all I can do is think, “When am I going to get to read next?” and find myself waking up earlier than usual just to have time alone with my book (*cough* Demon Copperhead *cough*).

I did Laura Vanderkam’s January 2024 Time Tracking Challenge earlier this month and tracked my time for 168 hours (a full week). One thing that struck me was how much I had going on while cooking dinner. For example, I might be cooking from a recipe while listening to a Marco Polo, playlist, or podcast, and I have to hit pause to answer questions from Chloe or listen to knock-knock jokes or admire whatever thing she MUST show me, then I get distracted and forget I was listening to something, then I have to scroll on my phone to get to the cooking instructions because I somehow lost my spot on the stupidly long blog post, and then once things are at the hands-off stage and everything is happily simmering on the stove I likely pick my phone back up and shoot off a text or check my work email or open Substack or remember to hit play on my AirPods or all of the above. Oh, and there’s the timer for dinner! I feel like a kettle of water that’s reached boiling point.

An unexpected bonus of this reading deprivation is the space to focus on a task at hand. Or, if I don’t have a task, I let my mind wander. I’m texting less. I’m checking email less. I’m losing my patience less often. I’m journaling more. I’m staring at the birds (even) more. I’m seeking out conversations with my family more.

I’m less frazzled. I’m more in control of my attention.

I spent the morning playing with McKinsey's little boys so she could have some time alone with her newborn. I had the *best* time. I brought some of my favorite seek-and-find books and pulled out a bunch of my tricks-to-delight-kids, like mixing up the toy animals and their homes so that the bee was in the fish bowl, the dog was in the horse stable, and the cow was in the bee hive getting stung and saying MOOOO!

Manse kept saying, “You’re funny!” (Best compliment you could give me.)

Imaginary play is something that comes easily to me, and I really enjoy it IF/WHEN I’m able to be fully present. It’s easy to be present with other people’s kids because 1) you’re likely not trying to also cook/clean/work/shower/etc while you’re with them. I left McKinsey’s house feeling inspired and excited to delight Chloe the way I delighted Manse. We set off on a walk right after school and I told her a “Missy and Ruby” story. I’ve been telling Missy and Ruby stories for years. Missy is the big sister who loves rules and is very obedient. Ruby is the incredibly naughty little sister. Every story involves three rules; Ruby always breaks all three. Today, Missy and Ruby’s parents took them to IHOP. Ruby kept getting out of her seat and bothering other diners, she went into the kitchen (!!), and she drizzled syrup over every food on the table.

Chloe loved it.

I loved it, too.